Sometimes You Just Have to Hit Somebody
by Laughing
Summary: Series of oneshots in which the Mercers get into tiffs with each other. First chapter is Bobby and Evelyn. Rated T for language.
1. Chapter 1

My first Four Brothers fanfic! Lately, I can't seem to get the Mercer brothers off my mind, and it was about midnight last night when this popped into my head. All feedback, critiques, and suggestions will be appreciated. Enjoy!

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Once, Evelyn Mercer slapped Bobby.

It was before Jack, before Angel, before Jerry. Just Evelyn and Bobby, and Bobby was being as impossible as usual.

"_Ma_," he whined, throwing his pencil down for the fifth time that evening. "I fucking swear to you, algebra is not something I'm going to need, ever."

"Oh is that so?" she asked, her voice calm as she sipped her tea, looking on as Bobby continued to try to wheedle his way out of doing his homework.

"Yes!"

"Considering the last time you swore something to me it was that you wouldn't use curse words in my house ever again, I'm not quite inclined to believe you."

Bobby had the grace to look shamefaced for about ten seconds before he started in on her again. "How about I just watch one hour of TV, and then I come back to it. You know, that way my brain can relax and shi--stuff," he said, quickly correcting himself.

"Bobby," she said, setting down her tea cup and leaning forward, "it is so important to me that you try in school. Education is the key to the future. Without it, it's too easy to fall into the wrong path. We've talked about this before, sweetie. Remember?"

Bobby rolled his pencil back and forth across the table with his thumb. "Maybe the 'wrong path' is more fun," he muttered under his breath.

Evelyn raised an eyebrow. "Is that what you think?" she asked, the cadence of her voice never changing.

"Well, duh," Bobby said, meeting her eyes. "You think it's so bad to smoke or drink or skip school or fight, but all of those things are _fun_. Algebra is not fun. And when I'm an adult, and I don't have to listen to anybody, I am definitely staying on the fun path."

"Do you have fun when I find out that you've done those things?"

Bobby dropped his gaze. "No. But I'm talking about when I'm, like, a grown up, and you can't ground me. School is supposed to prepare me for the future, right? Well, algebra isn't, so I shouldn't have to do it."

"So you shouldn't do anything if it's not going to prepare you for being an adult?" Evelyn asked, turning back everything Bobby said into a question that made him rethink his stance in the way that she always did, and that he hated.

Bobby thought about it for a moment. 'Yes' didn't seem like the wrong answer. All the teachers always talked about being prepared for the future. "Right," he said, sticking his chin out in confidence in his answer.

"How does skipping school prepare you for later life?" she asked with no accusations or hints of patronization in her voice, just curiosity.

"Not doing things, like algebra, that don't prepare me for my future is just as important as doing things that _do_ prepare me," Bobby said, growing more and more comfortable in his argument.

"Hmm," Evelyn murmured. "I think I'm beginning to understand. You skip class, because you won't need a work ethic, not to mention any basic reading and writing skills, in adulthood. Alright. So you must smoke, because you simply can't wait for the lung disease that you're sure to develop in the next few decades. And if that doesn't happen, then you will always have cirrhosis of the liver to look forward to from all the drinking, if you continue at the pace you've been going. And as an added plus, when you get into a fight, and you're too weak from the emphysema and liver disease to defend yourself properly, and you get your teeth knocked out, it won't really matter to you as you'll have no idea just how many you've lost as by then you'll have forgotten how to count, as you did away with math way back in the ninth grade. Actually, I've got to hand it to you, Bobby. You seem like you've got your future quite planned out. I'll be so proud."

Despite her harsh words, Evelyn never raised her voice or hardened her tone. Instead she looked at her son with soft, disappointed eyes and made her point as clear to him as she could. That she gave him no reason to overreact only made Bobby angrier. If she would just yell at him, then he could yell back without feeling like an asshole. Instead, he just felt like a thoroughly chastised five year old, and hell if that didn't piss him off.

"Ma...why do you have to be like that?" he complained, feeling a familiar anger start to rise up inside his chest. "I'm not going to be a screwup."

"Oh? Well then perhaps I misunderstood your life goals. Smoking, drinking, and fighting, that's what you said you wanted to do, right?"

"Yeah, but that's not _all_. Jesus, Ma."

"Tell me what else, then."

Bobby squirmed uncomfortably. "I don't know! I'm only fourteen, for Christ's sake. Do I have to have it all figured out right now?"

A soft smile came over Evelyn's face. "Of course not, Bobby. You have so much potential and so many wonderful qualities that you can do whatever you want with your life."

Bobby's scowl lessened. "Yeah?"

"Absolutely. Now, as I was saying before, in order for the world to open itself up to you, you must have an education. You _must_ have a high school diploma, which means, sweetheart, that you must do your algebra homework. So get to it."

Bobby's scowl returned full force. "No!" he shouted, angry at himself for having stepped right into that. "You twisted up everything I was saying."

"How did I twist up everything you were saying?"

"By...by...you just did!" he stammered, getting frustrated when he couldn't formulate what he wanted to say. "I don't need math, Ma!"

"Bobby, please lower your voice. There's no need to shout."

"I can if I want to!" he yelled, raising his voice further in defiance. "Damn it! Just because you never fucking want to yell doesn't mean that I don't, or that I can't!"

Evelyn sighed softly. "Bobby."

Her refusal to be riled enraged Bobby. "Stop being so calm! You say all kinds of shit all the time, and you think you can get away with saying whatever the fuck you want, like that I'm going to be a screwup, just because you use a goddamned inside voice!"

"Bobby, calm down. You are getting angry about nothing," Evelyn said, understanding that this was just Bobby's way, but also growing impatient with his constant spurts of anger. "You are only making it worse for yourself, because you're saying things that you'll regret later."

"Don't you tell me what I'll fucking regret. You have no idea what I regret!"

Evelyn raised an eyebrow. "That's enough, Bobby. Calm down."

"No!" he shouted, rising from his chair. "_No!_ I don't have to calm down if I don't fucking feel like it! I don't have to do anything you say. I don't have to lower my voice, and I don't have to do my fucking algebra homework!" With that, Bobby swept his papers and textbook off the table and onto the floor with a loud crash. Evelyn stood also, and Bobby waited for a reaction. When he got none, he continued, "What do you think of that, you...you..._bitch_!"

That was the line. Bobby didn't expect Evelyn's hand to smartly connect with his cheek. The slap wasn't very hard, and it wouldn't leave a mark, but it made Evelyn's point.

"Bobby Mercer," she began, in a very, very quiet voice as Bobby stared at her in shock. "I will not tolerate that kind of language or behavior in this house. Even when you are angry, you will be respectful, do you understand me?"

"Ma…I...I…" Bobby's eyes looked panicky as they darted around her face, searching for a clue as to what was happening. "I didn't...I mean...I…"

"No," Evelyn said, shaking her head. "I don't want an excuse or an apology at this moment. I want you to understand that it is imperative for you to keep your anger in check. Do your homework, don't do your homework. That will be the least of your worries in life if you continue to blow up without provocation at everyone near you." Her tone softened further, and she laid a gentle hand on Bobby's face. "I love you more than anything in the world, do you know that? I want you to have every opportunity that you want to do the things you dream about, but we've got some work to do yet."

"Yes ma'am," Bobby mumbled quickly, staring at his shoes in shame.

Evelyn's hand moved to Bobby's chin and she raised it so that his eyes were forced to meet her. Shame colored his face as he looked at her. "I'm sorry, Ma," he said desperately. "I'm really, really sorry. I didn't mean it. I'm sorry. I can' t believe I… I'm so sorry, Ma."

"Apology accepted, sweetie. Forget about it."

"I won't. I can't. Ma, you should kick my ass. Really."

A small smile came over Evelyn's face. "Oh, Bobby," she said fondly, kissing him on the cheek. "Why don't you just finish your homework, and we'll call it even. Deal?"

"Yes'm," he said, moving to pick up his book when she stopped him by grabbing hold of his arm.

"Hey," she said, "none of this 'ma'am' business. Understand?"

With a small grin, Bobby nodded, and was relieved when Evelyn pulled him into a hug. She knew how physical Bobby was, and even though she suspected that she would never strike him again, she knew that, in that moment, it had been the only thing that would snap him out of it and get his attention, just as she knew right now that a hard embrace was the only thing he needed to reassure himself of her love.


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks for the reviews, guys! This story is definitely appealing to my brain, and so here is an unprecedented second chapter in as many days. Enjoy.

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Bobby Mercer would smack around Jerry and Angel many, many times, but he'd never forget the look on Angel's face the first time he did so.

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"So you're the new kid, huh?" Bobby asked, sliding into the cracked vinyl booth of the local diner. He'd stayed out all night and had only just got home to find a note on the door telling him that his mother, Jerry, and new little brother would be at the diner for breakfast.

Dark, sullen eyes lazily met his as the kid gave a nod.

Bobby bit back a smile and turned to Jerry. "Hey man," he said. "Was, uh, was Ma mad?"

Jerry rolled his eyes. "I don't think she even really realized that you hadn't come home at all. She was too busy getting everything ready for Angel."

"Angel?" Bobby asked, confused.

Jerry nodded at the smaller black boy. "Bobby, meet Angel. Angel, this is Bobby. Ignore him as much as you can."

Bobby responded to this with a light smack upside Jerry's head. "Don't be an asshole," he said before refocusing on Angel. "You got here last night?"

Angel gave him an obligatory nod.

"Not feeling chatty?" At Angel's glare, Bobby smirked. "Point taken. Where is Ma, anyway?"

"She got here and realized that she'd forgotten her wallet at home, so she left us here and went back to get it. I'm surprised you didn't run into her on your way here."

"Hmm," Bobby said, opening his menu. "So what does everybody want?"

"An omelet," Jerry said, "and hash browns. What about you, Angel?"

"Nothin'" he muttered, not even opening the menu.

Jerry raised an eyebrow and exchanged a glance with Bobby who let out a low whistle.

"You know, you can be pissy all you want, Princess, but there's no way Ma's gonna let you get away with not eating," Bobby said, watching to see how Angel would react.

"Fuck off," Angel whispered, opening his menu to block his face from his two new foster brothers that sat across the table from him.

Jerry reached over and hit the menu back down onto the table. Eyebrows still raised, he gave Angel a slow, measuring look.

Bobby, on the other hand, just laughed. "I like you, kid," he said.

This only made Angel scowl as snatched his menu back from Jerry. "Don't touch my stuff," he said.

Bobby kept laughing. "Christ, but you're just a little bitch, aren't you?"

Angel's head shot up at that and he turned to glower at Bobby. Jerry slapped Bobby's leg. "Just leave him alone, man. You're not helping."

Bobby opened his mouth to argue, but was interrupted by Evelyn arriving at the table.

"Bobby," she greeted, smiling. "I'm glad you found my note. I see you've met Angel?"

"Yeah. I like him."

Evelyn frowned slightly at the way Bobby said that, but she only replied, "That's good to hear, sweetheart." Taking her seat beside Angel, she opened her menu. "So, are we ready to order?"

"I think so," Jerry said, eyeing Angel, who was staring at the table.

The waitress came and everyone ordered, including Angel after he decided it wasn't worth making Evelyn mad about--plus he was pretty hungry.

After everyone had their drinks, Evelyn turned to her oldest son. "Bobby, I got a call from the school yesterday."

Feigning nonchalance, Bobby glanced at her. "Oh yeah? They giving me a student of the month award?"

"More like skipper of the month," Jerry muttered, earning himself a kick in the shin from Bobby.

Evelyn sighed and took a long drink of her coffee. Bobby met her eyes, and, seeing her disappointment, dropped his gaze.

"I'm sorry, Ma," he said, giving her the respect of not making excuses. She knew by now that he didn't have a real reason for skipping school, and she'd stopped asking.

Evelyn nodded in acknowledgment, then turned to Jerry. "Now, Jeremiah, we will talk about the lamp when we get home, just so you're aware."

Bobby choked on his orange juice. "You break a lamp, sweetheart?" he asked, chuckling. "Which one?"

Jerry was quick to avoid eye contact with his older brother. "Why do you care? It was just a lamp."

"How'd you break it?" asked a quiet, curious voice from across the table. Everyone turned to look at Angel, and Bobby grinned as Jerry got flustered.

"I...shit, it was just an accident, alright? I was just looking for my shoes, and...I just tripped and the lamp was there…" Jerry muttered, relieved when the waitress appeared with their food, taking the attention off of him.

The subject was dropped for a few merciful minutes until Bobby, thinking about Jerry's explanation while he ate, realized something very important.

"Hey, Jer?" he asked, setting down his fork.

"What?"

"Remember yesterday, when you were doing your homework in my room and you fell asleep?"

"Yeah…"

"Well, before I left last night, I didn't want to have to drag your ass back to your own room, so I put a blanket over you and took off your shoes. Considering how much of your crap you always leave in my room, I'm assuming that you left your shoes there until you needed them again?"

"Bobby…" Jerry began, wary of his brother's temper.

"So you were in my room, looking for your shoes, and you tripped over your backpack that you left on my floor, right?"

"Well, I…"

"Which means that you didn't break one of Ma's lamps. You broke _my_ lamp. Were you gonna tell me, you little jerk?"

Bobby didn't look furious or anything, so Jerry tried to play it cool. "'Course I was, Bobby. And, besides, it's just a lamp. I'll buy you a new one today, okay?"

"So you mean you broke the bedside lamp, right? Not the other one." Bobby lifted a dangerous eyebrow, daring Jerry to lie to him.

"No," Jerry whispered, scooting as close to the wall and as far away from Bobby as possible.

"What did you say?" Bobby demanded.

"Bobby," Evelyn cut in, sensing his anger.

"No, Jerry, which lamp did you break?" Bobby continued, relentless.

Jerry closed his eyes and said, "Your lava lamp."

"You fucking broke my lava lamp? You bastard, I'm going to fucking kill you!" Bobby said, his voice rising with each word as he reached over to punch Jerry in the shoulder.

"Ow! I'm sorry!" Jerry exclaimed. "It was an accident."

"Oh you'll be sorry, I can promise you that. That's a fucking guarantee. You just wait until we're outside."

"Bobby," came Evelyn's quiet, pointed voice. "You're scaring your brother."

"He better be scared," Bobby said, but frowned as he leaned over to get a better look at Jerry's face. He was going to make Jerry pay, alright, but Jerry was used to Bobby's threats by now, and knew better than to think Bobby would actually hurt him.

"Your _other_ brother," Evelyn clarified.

Bobby remembered Angel, and turned to look at him. His lips were set in a thin line, giving away his clenched teeth. His face was set in a scowl, but his eyes were open wide, ruining his tough guy facade.

"Oh…" Bobby said, thinking fast. He needed to fix this if he ever wanted to gain Angel's trust.

The waitress dropped off their check at the table, and Evelyn picked it up. "I'm going up front to pay. I want this fixed and settled by the time I come back, understand?"

Bobby nodded and waited until she was out of earshot to say anything. It was Jerry, however, who spoke first.

"Angel, Bobby's just b.. Really, he's full of shit. He'd never actually hurt me, or you, for that matter."

Angel was far from convinced. He eyed Bobby coolly, obviously viewing him as a threat now.

"Aw, damn it, kid," Bobby said. "Jerry's right. When I said that shit, I just meant that I was going to, like, push his face into the snow until he hollered uncle or something. He may be a little bitch, and a complete asshole for breaking my _lava lamp_," he shot a glare at Jerry, "but he's still my baby brother. I'm not just going to punch his face in. Believe me?" he asked.

"I'm not a baby," Jerry mumbled, giving Bobby a shove.

Glancing from Angel to Jerry, Bobby said, "I'd just keep my hands to myself if I were you, cupcake." With a glance to Evelyn's returning figure, Bobby said, "Angel? You believe me that I wouldn't hurt Jer, right? You're not scared of me?"

Angel just flipped him off. "I'm not scared of you, asshole. I could kick your ass."

Bobby laughed at that. "I'm sure you could, little man. So, when Ma asks, you tell her that now I'm afraid of you, okay? And so is Jerry. We're terrified."

The three boys stood as Evelyn approached the table. She placed a hand on Angel's back. "Don't you pay any mind to Bobby, Angel. His head is just too hot for his own good."

Angel nodded, and Bobby was spared a lecture. However…

"You and I still have some unfinished business, Jeremiah," he hissed as they walked behind Evelyn and Angel.

Jerry didn't reply, and the ride home was silent. Once they pulled into the driveway, though, Bobby jumped out and blocked the path to the door from his brothers. "Ma?" he said, "we're going to build a snowman, okay? Get to know Angel a little better."

Skepticism colored Evelyn's smile, but all she said was, "Don't break any bones."

She went into the house, leaving the three of them outside. As soon as she was gone, Angel said, "I don't want to build a snowman."

Bobby rolled his eyes. "Good. Snowmen are for fairies." He pivoted to face Jerry, ready with a lecture about the sanctity of lava lamps, and was met with a snowball to the face. "Why you little shit," he said in good humor, running toward Jerry and tackling him to the ground. "You think that was funny? I'll show you funny, black boy." Grabbing a handful of snow, Bobby smashed it into Jerry's face, getting some of it down the collar of his shirt. While Jerry sputtered, Bobby took the opportunity to straddle himself over Jerry's stomach and promptly plop down on top of his brother. Abandoning hopes for more snowballs, Bobby used both hands to pin down Jerry's arms. "Now, you listen and you listen good, Jeremiah Mercer. You use my room, you leave your shit laying around--fine. Who gives a damn? But you don't break _my_ shit, especially my lava lamp! Ma gave me that lamp on my first birthday here, because I told her I didn't want anything and she has horrible taste, but I loved that damn lamp and now _you_ broke it. Got anything to say, you little bastard?"

Jerry stopped flailing for a moment. "You're a dick, Bobby. But I really am sorry. I know that Ma gave you that lamp, and I swear it was an accident."

Bobby narrowed his eyes at his brother, scrutinizing. "Okay, fine. You pass the Bobby lie detector test. You break anything else of mine, and I'll have your ass, understand?"

"_Yes, _Bobby."

"Okay." Bobby got off of Jerry, and when he didn't move to get up, he reached down a hand to help him. Jerry took it gratefully and let Bobby pull him up. Bobby gave his cheek a pat, then turned to see Angel, unmoving in the snow, staring at them. "See?" Bobby said, gesturing toward Jerry. "No harm done."

Slowly, Angel nodded, then broke into a small smirk when he saw Jerry move away from Bobby, then throw a snowball at his brother's ass. Bobby twirled around and was quick to retaliate, hitting Jerry in the chest with an overly large snowball. The two continued for a while, until Bobby got the bright idea to redirect his snowball at Angel, hitting him square in the face.

Angel's anger came back full-force as he wiped the snow out of his eyes. "You fucker!" he screamed at Bobby, visibly shivering.

Bobby strolled over to the kid and gave him a light slap upside the head. Angel looked at him, shocked, and Bobby just laughed. "Don't get mad, kiddo, just get even."

Finally shedding the last of his put-on bravado, Angel bent to scoop up some snow, and chunked it at Jerry. Bobby laughed harder as Jerry sputtered, but he got a surprise himself when Angel's second snowball hit him not three seconds later.

_Oh yeah, _he thought, _you'll fit in just fine, kiddo._


End file.
